Now that I’m in my 30s, I really appreciate the journey I took during my 20s. It was a real voyage of self-discovery. Though technically an adult and in charge of my life, like many other 20-somethings, I had barely begun to live and I just muddled through as best I could. I didn’t really know what I was doing because I didn’t really know myself. There were a lot of mistakes along the way but with that came lessons, learning and growing. I don’t regret any of the risks I took in my 20s – they helped me figure out who I am and who I’m not. I entered my 30s excited for a new decade to begin, with a firm understanding and appreciation for the woman that I had become.
One thing I have learnt is that everyone is wired differently. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do about it aside from embracing it! You can’t fight how you’ve been wired, much like being a morning person or a night owl – no matter how much I try to embrace early starts I just adore the peace and solitude of the nighttime too much be fast asleep at 11 pm. I could easily stay up til 3 am every night, equally happy with company or on my own. I guess it’s for similar reasons that my style tends to be extra rather than minimalist and I’ve never met a carb I didn’t like – sometimes you just are the way you are.
Carbs and shoe choices aside, getting to know myself and why I tick is one of the most rewarding things I’ve done. I’ve been working on playing up my strengths and working on my weaknesses. One of the things I’ve struggled with for years is learning when to walk away from a situation which no longer serves me – I have an awful tendency want to hold on due to misplaced loyalties. I’m really working on this as it’s held me back so many times.
Learning to walk away from something which no longer serves you, grows you or makes you happy is one of the best lessons I’ve learnt. There is something incredibly powerful about knowing yourself and your worth enough to put a hand up and admit that a situation is not for you, it’s empowering to say “I am worth more than this”.
In the past, I may have held onto friendships, relationships and work situations for a lot longer than necessary but I have gotten so much better at editing my life. I realised that it’s MY life and I shouldn’t just make space for everyone that wants to be in it, they have to earn it.
Sometimes admitting that a situation has come to a natural end is harder to face up to and admit but holding onto something that’s dead is so damaging. I realised that the end is just another word for beginning – every time I have let go of something or someone, I have just made space for something better to come into my life. Don’t just take my word for it though, I wanted to share some lovely quotes which discuss the art of letting go:
Let it hurt, then let it go – r.h. Sin
I love r.h Sin’s writing. To me, this quote means being true to your feelings and emotions, acknowledging the hurt and deciding to let it all go.
Never let anyone half love you – Anonymous
You are simply way too wonderful to be half loved. You deserve the entire world, so don’t put up with anything less.
Making a big life change is pretty scary. But you know what’s even scarier? Regret – Anonymous
Letting something go or walking away from a situation can be so daunting and scary. I get it. But the only thing worse is staying in a situation which only drains you and brings you negativity. Trust me, I’ve been there.
If you don’t love yourself you’ll never feel like anyone else does either – Bridgette Devoue
I adore this quote. I see it as a reminder to respect and honour your worth, because no one else will if you don’t! If you value yourself highly, you will force others to see your worth. Don’t let someone treat you like a piece of glass when you’re a diamond.
You don’t have to see the whole staircase just take the first step – Martin Luther King
I have definitely felt a lot of fear and apprehension when I’ve been deciding whether I should walk away from a situation. Part of the fear stems from not knowing what is coming next. But you don’t need to have everything planned out, just the next step. Sometimes you just need to put one foot in front of the other.
Dress – Tobi
Boots – Topshop
Bag – Saint Laurent
Photography by Adorngirl.